205+ Funniest White Chicks Quotes to Make You Laugh

“White Chicks” is a classic comedy film that has left audiences in stitches with its hilarious dialogue, unforgettable scenes, and witty one-liners. The movie is packed with quotes that capture the essence of laugh-out-loud humor, making it a fan favorite even today. Whether you’re reminiscing about iconic moments or discovering these gems for the first time, this collection of the funniest quotes from “White Chicks” is sure to brighten your day. 

We’ve gathered the most hilarious, outrageous, and memorable lines that will have you laughing out loud. Below, you’ll find a selection of quotes categorized under creative headings to highlight the best moments from the film. Enjoy and share the laughs!

Classic White Chicks One-Liners That Never Get Old 😂

• “Yo, mama is so old, her breast milk is powdered. You scare the baby!” 😂
• “It’s scary how much I look like Halle Berry!” 😂
• “Your mother is so old, she dreams in black and white.” 😂
• “Oh my God, Britney Spears is bald?!” 😂
• “You wanna talk about mothers? It’s mama joke time!” 😂
• “I am so frickin’ pissed right now!” 😂
• “I’m gonna write a book. It’s gonna be a bestseller—’How to Tell If a White Girl Likes You’!” 😂
• “I’m gonna have a BF! Oh my God, she’s gonna have a bitch fit!” 😂
• “Hold my poodle!” 😂
• “This is some ludicrous behavior!” 😂
• “It’s Tina the Talking Tummy!” 😂
• “You don’t know what I’ve been through today!” 😂
• “I think I broke my nail… again!” 😂
• “Honey, you are so white, Wonderbread can’t compete!” 😂
• “I’m not listening to you, you’re just mad because I’m fabulous.” 😂
• “I am totally bugging right now!” 😂
• “I told you, you look like Donkey Kong in drag!” 😂
• “Who are you calling ghetto?!” 😂
• “This is madness! This is White Chicks!” 😂
• “Girl, don’t even go there with me. I will tear you apart!” 😂

White Chicks Insults That Hit Hard 🤣

• “Your lipstick is bleeding like a crime scene!” 🤣
• “Oh my God, she smells like sour milk!” 🤣
• “If I wanted to look like a stick figure, I’d wear your outfit!” 🤣
• “I’m sorry, did someone ask for discount Barbie?!” 🤣
• “You walk like you’re auditioning for a zombie movie.” 🤣
• “Please, honey, you wouldn’t know fashion if it slapped you.” 🤣
• “Do you even lift or is that just all talk?” 🤣
• “Girl, those shoes are tragic, call for help.” 🤣
• “You look like a hot mess, and not in a good way.” 🤣
• “I thought plastic surgery was supposed to improve things!” 🤣
• “Please tell me that’s not a real Chanel.” 🤣
• “Did you get that from the clearance bin?!” 🤣
• “Your makeup could survive a hurricane.” 🤣
• “That dress is so tight, even the seams are begging for mercy.” 🤣
• “Honey, you need a makeover and a miracle.” 🤣
• “That’s not a smile, that’s a grimace.” 🤣
• “If your shoes could talk, they’d be screaming for help.” 🤣
• “Girl, your outfit is giving me secondhand embarrassment.” 🤣
• “If confidence is key, then you need to get a new lock.” 🤣
• “That bag? Oh, sweetheart, it’s a knockoff.” 🤣

White Chicks Quotes That Will Have You In Stitches 😆

• “Somebody call the cops, because this outfit is criminal!” 😆
• “You better stop or I’m calling the fashion police!” 😆
• “Does anyone else smell desperation, or is that just her perfume?” 😆
• “I’ve seen reality TV shows with more dignity than that!” 😆
• “This is the worst haircut I’ve ever seen, and I lived through the ’90s.” 😆
• “That’s not a tan, honey, that’s a spray-on nightmare.” 😆
• “You couldn’t find style if it hit you with a Gucci bag.” 😆
• “I’d tell you to fix your face, but we don’t have that kind of time.” 😆
• “Girl, that makeup looks like it was done in a funhouse mirror.” 😆
• “If you had a nickel for every bad outfit, you’d be a millionaire.” 😆
• “You couldn’t pull that look off if you had ten stylists.” 😆
• “Are you a Kardashian now? Because those lips are out of control.” 😆
• “Your outfit screams ‘I tried,’ but failed.” 😆
• “Not even Photoshop could save that look.” 😆
• “You’ve got more foundation on than a building.” 😆
• “Who let you out of the house with that eye shadow?” 😆
• “I thought we left those hairstyles back in 2002.” 😆
• “You look like a backup dancer for a ’90s boy band.” 😆
• “Honey, you are about two bad outfits away from a meltdown.” 😆
• “You’ve got enough hairspray on to survive a windstorm!” 😆

White Chicks Fashion Fails You Can’t Forget 😂 

• “Is that a belt or a cry for help?” 😂
• “Who told you that dress was cute? They lied.” 😂
• “That outfit is like fashion roadkill.” 😂
• “Your style is retro, and not in a good way.” 😂
• “That hat looks like a rejected piece from a clown costume.” 😂
• “I’ve seen more class in a thrift shop window.” 😂
• “You’re dressed like a third wheel at a bad wedding.” 😂
• “Is this a costume party, or do you always look like that?” 😂
• “You know what would go well with that outfit? A paper bag.” 😂
• “You’re one accessory away from a disaster.” 😂
• “That look is more ‘scarecrow chic’ than you probably intended.” 😂
• “Did you get dressed in the dark this morning?” 😂
• “You’re rocking that ‘I just rolled out of bed’ look, huh?” 😂
• “That shirt looks like it was attacked by a toddler with scissors.” 😂
• “Your pants are so tight, I’m surprised you can breathe.” 😂
• “You’re wearing Crocs…on purpose?” 😂
• “Is that a fanny pack? Please tell me it’s ironic.” 😂
• “I didn’t know they still made cargo pants.” 😂
• “That dress looks like it was made out of curtains.” 😂
• “Who let you leave the house in that horror show of an outfit?” 😂

Iconic White Chicks Comebacks That Slay 🤣

• “Oh, you’re talking to me? I didn’t know basic was fluent in sarcasm!” 🤣
• “Sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of how awesome I am!” 🤣
• “Did you say something? I stopped listening at ‘hello.’” 🤣
• “You thought you did something there, didn’t you? Well, you didn’t.” 🤣
• “If I wanted your opinion, I’d ask… but I won’t.” 🤣
• “Is that all you got? I’ve been insulted by better.” 🤣
• “Oh, I’m sorry, did the truth hurt your feelings?” 🤣
• “I don’t have time for this; I’ve got more important things to do, like existing.” 🤣
• “You say ‘potato,’ I say ‘you’re irrelevant.'” 🤣
• “Wow, you must be the reason for all the warning labels.” 🤣
• “Oh, honey, I’ve got 99 problems, and you’re not one.” 🤣
• “I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.” 🤣
• “I’ve seen better comebacks from a yo-yo.” 🤣
• “You’re about as useful as a screen door on a submarine.” 🤣
• “Nice try, but you still look like a hot mess.” 🤣
• “I’d love to stay and chat, but I’d hate to waste more of my greatness.” 🤣
• “That comeback was so weak, I’m embarrassed for you.” 🤣
• “You’ve got something on your face… oh wait, that’s just your attitude.” 🤣
• “I’d love to respond, but I don’t argue with people who are wrong.” 🤣
• “Your ego must be real small if it can be hurt that easily.” 🤣

Sassy White Chicks Moments That Will Make You Laugh 😜

• “I’m sorry, did you just call me a bitch? Because that’s Miss Bitch to you!” 😜
• “Girl, I will cut you with my words before I even lift a finger.” 😜
• “You couldn’t handle me even if I came with instructions.” 😜
• “Oh honey, I’ve seen better hair on a Chia Pet.” 😜
• “That attitude? It’s called fabulousness, and you should try it sometime.” 😜
• “You think you’re cute? Bless your heart, but no.” 😜
• “Why do I get the feeling you’ve been in more catfights than beauty pageants?” 😜
• “My mirror told me I look good, but yours… lied.” 😜
• “I’ve got 99 problems, and your opinion ain’t one.” 😜
• “Keep talking, you’re just making me look even more awesome.” 😜
• “That’s a lot of attitude for someone who still wears Crocs.” 😜
• “If I had a dollar for every bad thing you just said, I’d buy a better comeback.” 😜
• “You don’t like me? Well, that makes two of us, because I don’t care.” 😜
• “Sweetheart, you’re a 7. On a good day.” 😜
• “Do I intimidate you? Good.” 😜
• “You’re acting like your personality is on sale, honey.” 😜
• “Why don’t you come back when you’ve got some style to show off?” 😜
• “Who needs a filter when you’ve got this much sass?” 😜
• “You know, I’d help you with that problem, but I left my patience at home.” 😜
• “I’m just gonna stand here and let you be wrong in peace.” 😜

White Chicks Friendship Quotes That Are Total Goals 😂

• “You make me look like I have my life together, thanks for that!” 😂
• “You’re my partner in crime, even if the crime is eating all the snacks!” 😂
• “We don’t need words, just eye contact and we’re laughing!” 😂
• “Friends who roast together, stay together!” 😂
• “You’re the Monica to my Rachel, but with more sass!” 😂
• “We’re basically the definition of friendship goals!” 😂
• “My favorite person to do nothing with.” 😂
• “We’re a perfect match, like chips and salsa.” 😂
• “Best friends don’t let each other do  foolish stuff alone!” 😂
• “Together, we could probably rule the world, or at least a reality TV show.” 😂
• “No one gets me like you do… probably because we’re both a little baffling.” 😂
• “I’d share my fries with you. That’s true love!” 😂
• “Our friendship is tighter than my jeans after a pizza night!” 😂
• “When we’re together, it’s double trouble and twice the fun!” 😂
• “You’re my person, and that’s better than any title!” 😂
• “We’re like a nonstop comedy show—always entertaining!” 😂
• “If I had to be stranded on a desert island, I’d pick you because you’d bring snacks!” 😂
• “We’re each other’s hype women, no doubt about it!” 😂
• “There’s no one else I’d rather be weird with!” 😂
• “You’re the only one who understands my baffling and loves me anyway!” 😂

White Chicks , fearless Moments You Can’t Forget 🤣 

• “I’m gonna have a BF, and you don’t want to see me have a bitch fit!” 🤣
• “If you say one more word, I will shove my foot so far up your butt!” 🤣
• “Don’t hate me because you ain’t me!” 🤣
• “Excuse me, can you point me to the nearest exit for your nonsense?” 🤣
• “I’ve had better conversations with my hair straightener!” 🤣
• “Honey, even Google won’t be able to help you.” 🤣
• “You think you’re tough? I’ve had tougher nails.” 🤣
• “I’ll stop being sassy when you stop being so wrong.” 🤣
• “Is this a roast? Because you’re getting burned!” 🤣
• “I don’t even need to clap back; you’ve already embarrassed yourself.” 🤣
• “You call that a comeback? More like a go-back!” 🤣
• “Girl, you couldn’t handle me if I came with a warning label.” 🤣
• “Sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.” 🤣
• “You think you’re all that? You’re more like all nothing.” 🤣
• “Try again, sweetheart. That was a flop.” 🤣
• “You’re about as sharp as a marshmallow.” 🤣
• “You’re not funny, but your life choices are.” 🤣
• “Please, save the drama for your diary.” 🤣
• “Are you talking? I thought I heard someone say something irrelevant.” 🤣
• “That was cute. Do you have any other delusions you’d like to share?” 🤣

Funniest White Chicks Quotes About Relationships 😆 

• “Girl, if you’re waiting for Prince Charming, you’re gonna be waiting forever.” 😆
• “Love is blind, but I still see a lot of red flags!” 😆
• “If he can’t handle me at my worst, he doesn’t deserve me at my best.” 😆
• “I need a man who can handle my sass and bring me snacks.” 😆
• “Relationships are like work, and girl, I didn’t sign up for overtime.” 😆
• “Is he your boyfriend, or just someone who can’t take a hint?” 😆
• “If he says he’s ‘fine,’ girl, he’s lying!” 😆
• “Dating me is like riding a roller coaster—it’s thrilling, but hold on tight!” 😆
• “If he wanted to, he would… but he won’t.” 😆
• “Why settle for Mr. Right Now when you deserve Mr. Right?” 😆
• “If you have to ask, ‘Does he like me?’ The answer is no.” 😆
• “My ideal relationship? Netflix, pizza, and not having to talk.” 😆
• “Girl, if he doesn’t text back, he’s not worth it!” 😆
• “You say ‘compromise,’ I say ‘he better get it right the first time.’” 😆
• “Love is patient. But girl, I am not!” 😆
• “The only thing I’m committed to is my bed and maybe this pizza.” 😆
• “If love is pain, I’d rather just be comfortable.” 😆
• “I’m single because I won’t settle for anything less than a hero.” 😆
• “You want a relationship? Start by dating yourself first.” 😆
• “Love is in the air? Must be allergic, because I’m sneezing!” 😆

White Chicks Quotes That Are Pure Comedy Gold 😂

• “I am so frickin’ pissed right now, you have no idea!” 😂
• “You don’t understand! I’ve had a really bad day!” 😂
• “I’m gonna write a book: ‘How to Tell if a White Girl Likes You’!” 😂
• “I am so done with this drama, I can’t even!” 😂
• “Move, bitch, you’re blocking my sunshine!” 😂
• “I can’t believe you just said that! Are you baffling?” 😂
• “I’m one Starbucks latte away from losing it.” 😂
• “Oh no, honey. I don’t do apologies!” 😂
• “Is this real life, or am I just in a really bad sitcom?” 😂
• “Who needs therapy when you can just be fabulous?” 😂
• “Can we skip the drama and go straight to the fun part?” 😂
• “You think you’re cute? Well, so do I—but at least I’m right.” 😂
• “I’m not a regular girl, I’m a cool girl!” 😂
• “Did you just make that up, or are you just naturally ridiculous?” 😂
• “You’re so full of drama, even your reflection is tired of you.” 😂
• “Don’t worry, sweetie. The only thing out of place is your attitude.” 😂
• “Girl, I’ve seen better days on a rainy Monday.” 😂
• “Oh, so we’re doing this now? Alright, buckle up!” 😂
• “I don’t get paid enough to deal with your nonsense.” 😂
• “You talk a big game for someone who’s wearing last season’s shoes.” 😂